Where have I been?

 

And here we go - another "Where have I been" post.

This is a season in my life that is overshadowed by stress and responsibility. Since I was last posting on my blog, Mom was ill with both a serious intestinal issue and pneumonia. Just as she was recovering from that, she had a gall bladder attack that resulted in surgery. She is moving through recovery from that now. All of that has taken time and energy. Sometimes something has to give, and sometimes that something is my more creative (and not work-related) endeavors, such as this blog.

I hope that I'm back for a while, but one cannot predict.  Regular posts should start on Monday, July 20.

Life Note

Just a quick life note. You may have noticed that over the past few weeks, I haven't been posting as regularly, and that my posts, when I do upload them, are more photo orientated than words.

Mom had surgery a couple of weeks ago. It went well; the outcome was good, and her recovery has been at her home instead of in residential rehab, which is a good thing, and what she wanted. I'm amazed at how well she is doing. That said, it does mean that when I sit down to blog, I don't always have any inspiration. I've set aside the idea of taking classes for the time being (classes often provide blog inspiration) and my reading of spiritual development books has been slow. Plus, I sit down to work on the blog, and I just ... well ... don't. So I get up and walk away.

That said, I have gone back and filled in some blanks. I'm using the Lent Photo-a-day challenge from the United Methodist Church to write some posts. I like those - I look through my image gallery to see what connection the word inspires and post those.  If all goes to plan, those will replace my Friday Perspectives posts for the rest of Lent. If all goes to plan, the other posts will be my regular "thoughts" posts.

I'm reading a new book (for me) called An Unlikely Lent by Rachel Billups. I might not have chosen this to read, but my pastor did and is using it to lead a Lenten study at my church. I'm not able to attend the study, but I like to read what the class is reading, so I've picked it up. I say I wouldn't have chosen it, because I wouldn't have run across it, but I very much like it.  You'll see some upcoming posts inspired by it.

Also, I spent some time at the end of last year updating my library of blog images. I keep a Dropbox of images to use on the blog, ready for posting. These are often from our travels around the state and country.  Once I post them, I move them out of the Dropbox to avoid using them more than once. The stock of images was getting kind of low, so it has been renewed.

I hope you are having a blessed Lent and look forward to Easter with great joy.

 

20th Anniversary!

Twenty years ago today I posted my first entry on this blog.  I had already started a blog for my knitting (what is now Sandpiper Creates), but I wanted to have a place to share thoughts about faith and life.

At the beginning I posted something every day. I don't do that anymore. There have been sabbaticals from the blog, but my rhythm now is three posts a week, one of which is usually an image.

For me, the blog has become one of my spiritual disciplines - a way to explore what I am reading, what I am thinking, and what I am avoiding. It has been enriched by the books, sermons, and classes, as those have all enriched me. 

I'm grateful for these past 20 years, and hope to continue for many more.

Merry Christmas!

 I've never posted a video before without embedding it from YouTube; I hope it works.  Either way, I wish you and yours a very blessed Christmas and a Joyous New Year.

I'm Back

One of my pet peeves is when a person of does YouTube videos on a regular basis just stops doing them.  They pop back in for a bit and tell us all how they needed a break, and how they were prioritizing other things (more important than the YouTube channel), and that they are now determined to be back, posting regularly.  That's not my pet peeve.  My pet peeve is when they say that, but don't follow through with it. (and I need to be less judgmental). 

I would like to say that I deliberately took a break from the blog.  I've taken breaks before, but never one this long.  It wasn't deliberate - it was just falling out of the habit. I just unintentionally stopped posting.  (Makes it sound like it was an accident, doesn't it?).

I do like posting, though.  I like the discipline of it.  I like the inspiration that comes from it.  Often, I'm sitting in worship or in a meeting, and an idea for a post comes to my mind from what I'm hearing.  I jot the kernel of the idea down, and later, I write about it.  Blogging helps me listen to life more.  It helps me sharpen the saw of writing.  It opens ideas for me of God's presence and work in the world.  The blog is a good thing.  And I miss it when I stop.

So, today is December 19, and I'm planning the return to the blog.  My goal is to start posting on January 2 and to continue with the schedule of posts I had for the first part of 2022 - two written posts a week and an image post once a week.  I'm hoping that planning ahead with get me back in the groove of writing.  I like to write posts ahead, so here we go.

Over the past six months, Steve and I took an advanced course called Come to the Water.  I also took an online course called Devotion to Jesus.  I imagine my writing for those courses will influence some of my posts in the next few months. I've registered for another class - this one called Women Speak of God.  I hope that course is beneficial as well.  I'm still teaching a CLM Conference Course - we finish up on January 8.  I'll then start preparing for a third cohort class.  I think my writing is better when there is something else going on that sparks posts.

Third, I bought a keyboard for my iPad, which I hope will make writing more convenient - since I won't have to get out the laptop to do it.

So, there you go - planning, inspiration, and convenience - I hope all three of those combine to get me going and regularly posting on the blog.  And I hope I don't become an example of what bugs me about commitments given - commitment failure (but I can be less judgmental, can't I?).

Where Have I Been?

Where have I been?

My usual pattern for posting in the last couple of years is to post four days a week, with the Thursday post being an image.  There have been times when I have taken a break from posting, and, obviously, this time has been one of them.  

Sometimes breaks are planned - I might step back for a week while I am on vacation, or for a time when I feel that I need a break.  But this break was unplanned, and stemmed directly from the pandemic.  That isn't to say I've been sick - I have not been.  I am fine, and I'm grateful the rest of my family and friends are well, also.  

However, this has been a time of high anxiety.  I'm sure you have felt it as I have.  There is a break from normalcy, as we learn words that we didn't know before - or maybe that didn't exist before.  Words like social distancing and safer at home.  I have cycled between anxiety, grief, and peace.  I'm blessed that most often I feel peace, but grief or anxiety can rise up when I don't expect them to.  And I imagine the same is true for you.

I've stepped back from a few things.  I can feel anxiety rise as I watch the news, so I don't.  I check in so that I will know what is happening in the world, but I cannot watch the death toll rise or the dire predictions of what was or is to come.  I am responsibly connected, but not listening otherwise.  That was an intentional decision.  An unintentional decision is that it is harder to be creative.  I love cardmaking.  At first, I couldn't do it at all.  Now I can - gratefully and joyfully - but not as often.  The blog - another creative outlet - sat quiet.  I haven't been writing or posting.  I felt no draw to do so.  I felt guilty about that, because I thought I should be, but I haven't.  

I've also noticed that spiritual practices, such as prayer or devotionals, have not been happening.  I wrote in a Facebook post one day that I couldn't pray.  No words for prayer.  The day I posted that was the first day I sat down and made a card (which felt great, and even prayerful).  

Also, I haven't been able to set goals.  I have an organized mind, and lists of goals made me feel calmer - organized - less anxious.  But the pages I set aside for goal-setting in my journal have been purposefully - intentionally - blank for April and May.  I've been very busy, but haven't set goals.

Why am I telling you all of this?

I hope that you have been kind to yourself in this time of high anxiety and grief.  I hope you realize that what you are feeling - whatever it is - is a normal reaction to a very not-normal time in our world.  

That said, while the pandemic is still here, and we are in grief over the continued racial tensions (seems like such a small word for such a big thing) in our country, the body and mind learn to adjust.  I can pray again.  I hope to spend some time making cards today.  And I'm setting a goal of posting on the blog in June.  It will probably be three times a week, and we'll see where that goes.

Take care and be well.

Silent Black Screen

Hello,

I'm still here, but haven't been posting.  About the time I planned to return to the blog, my computer died.  It was fine on a Thursday when I used it happily for several hours, but by Sunday, it would not power on.  Just silent.  All amateur and professional attempts to revive it were not fruitful.  It remains dead.  It Will Not Power On.  Period.

I've ordered a new computer, and I am told it will be here this week.  Life is too busy at work for me to blog from there, so the blog will remain silent a little while longer.

The funeral for the dead computer will be delayed until the computer surgeon is able to extract its brain and transfer its thoughts, hopes, and aspirations to the new computer.

I hope you are staying warm and safe, and that your electronic equipment is alive and kicking.

Merry Christmas

 Hello, all,

I'll be taking a blog break for the rest of the year.  See you in 2019!  Merry Christnas.

Two week hiatus

Hi, all,

I will be on the road for parts of the next two weeks - I'll be back to the blog once I return.

Summer Plans

So, what will you be doing this summer?

In past years, I have taken a break from blogging during the summer. I haven't ruled that out, but thought I might try something else instead.

My plan for this summer (as it stands right now) is this:

1. Post four times a week instead of five.  I'll take Fridays off.
2. Stop posting Logos posts. Those are usually on Fridays, so I won't restrict myself to doing one of those every week.
3. Think about a few mini-series of posts - four posts in a week connected to each other. I already have some ideas about those, so I'll flesh those out.
4. As I usually do, if I'm on vacation, I'll take a blogging break.

I hope you enjoy your summer! Take some Fridays off - I love Fridays. There is something special about them - full of potential.

Short Break

Just so you know - I'm taking a short break from the blog. I'll be back next Tuesday, the day after Memorial Day.

See you then!

Authority

So, if you have time, go read this editorial piece in Christianity Today:

The question that Tish Harrison Warren is asking is this: Who is in Charge of the Christian Blogosphere? Her premise, I think, is that women (especially women, for some reason) are blogging, and no one is granting them the authority to do so. No one is watching them. No one is pulling them back when the "get it wrong." No one is stopping them from leading people astray.

Hmmm.

Now, don't misunderstand my motivation in writing this post. Warren is not talking about me. She's talking about people like Rachel Held Evans and Jen Hatmaker - women bloggers who have very large followings and who are NOT writing in support of the Evangelical/Conservative doctrines. She's talking about them because they are influencing a large number of people.

But the question of the source of my authority is still there. What is my authority in writing this blog post? In writing my blog at all?

I think my authority comes from God. I have a brain; I have the motivation to share my faith. (It's not secret - we all do), and those are gifts from God. I feel a calling to write this blog, and I believe the calling is from God. Believe me, it would be easier to stop doing it than to do it. But I want to do it, and I see from it that I grow when I do it (just like any other discipline).

 

Do I get it right all of the time? If you're reading this, you know that I do not. I'm telling you what I think - I'm telling you the conclusions that I believe God has led me to. (It's not a secret - it's called Sandpiper's Thoughts). I believe you have a brain, and that God is working through you, too, and that between you and me, God will do what God does, and use what I write to speak God's message to you. 

It's not at all flawless. It's not at all perfect. But I don't need anyone else's authority to do it. I don't need another man (or woman, for that matter) to watch me, or to grant approval on what I am doing. 

And if I don't, then neither does anyone else.

Two Disciplines

I've picked up two disciplines lately.

First, I'm back to blogging.  To many people that would not seem to be a discipline, but I find to be.  Giving intentional thought to matters of faith, daily, has an impact on my journey.  I've noticed it, even in just the last few days.  I think about God more, I watch for God more, I note God's presence more.  All of that, I think, makes me open to God more.  It might be someone odd to do that kind of journaling online (which is what blogging is to me), but I find it helpful.  And hopeful.

Secondly, as I mentioned a few days ago, I'm serving on the prayer team for an Emmaus Walk.  This is a new role for me - I think I've done every lay role now except for music (which no one would ever want me to do!).  After I said yes to the walk lay director, I started thinking about serving in the prayer chapel. Previously, I had served as media tech, and that position requires much preparation (at least it does for me to be comfortable on a walk).  I wondered what kind of prep work would be helpful for a person serving in the prayer chapel.  Hmm.  Prayer, I think.  So I started a prayer journal for the walk.  I try (especially recently) to write my prayers in it daily.  It's helpful.  And I hope that it prepares me for the task of praying during the weekend.

What disciplines can you pick up that would be helpful and hopeful for you?  It's such an individual decision - you need to decide what is best for who you are.  God's blessings on your decision.

Eight Years

I missed my blogiversary!

My first post to this blog was on November 29, 2005.  That's (counting on my fingers) eight years ago.

Much has changed in my life during those eight years.  My older son is now 20 (he was 12 when I started), and he is in college.  My younger son is 17 - he had just turned 9 when I started this blog.  He is about to graduate from high school.  I have a completely different job.  I used to be a research associate in a diabetes research lab; I am now on the staff of a United Methodist Foundation.  Steve (my wonderful husband) has also had a career change, and he is happy in his new work.  Our beagle, Molly, was 2 in 2005.  She is now 10 and a half years old and has a whole lot of white fur (that used to be black and tan).

We'll leave the counting of my gray hairs up to God.

The blog has changed.  For many of the first years I was writing, I posted something every day. There were times when I would fall asleep with the computer on my lap because I couldn't think of something to write.  I was afraid to not write every day, because I thought if I didn't have that kind of discipline, then I would fail to write at all.  That kind of writing and that kind of fear didn't always make for good posts.

Now, posting for the blog has become part of my daily devotional time.  Notice I didn't say writing. There are days when I write two or three posts, and other days when I don't write any.  I use a program called Evernote, and when I have the time and feel the inspiration, I write -- one, two, three or more posts (this is my third for today, and I feel more coming on).  When a thought for a post comes to me, I make a note (using my phone) in Evernote, so that I don't lose the idea.  When I have time, I can go back and write.  Each weekday morning, I post one of those writings to the blog.   Writing this way has lifted the every increasing weight of the blog the way it used to be.  I hope it has improved my writing.

In addition, I have gotten into the routine of not posting on the weekends, or on holidays, unless something special strikes me.  This has become a good solution for me.

I thank you for reading.  There are times when knowing that you are reading keeps me writing, and the writing is good for me.  I helps me grow closer to God, so I am grateful.

Sixth Anniversary

I was doing some calendar work today and noticed that yesterday was the 6th Anniversary of my first post to this blog. 

Much has changed since then.  I have a different career -- not just a different position in the same field, but a whole different field of work.  My boys, who were 12 and 9 then, are now 18 and 15.  One of them is in college and the other one will be driving soon. 

When I started the blog, I had just been on an Emmaus walk; now I have been on 7 teams, served as a Walk Lay Director and am just finishing up a term as Community Lay Director. 

The blog has changed.  In the beginning, I wrote more poetry, longer posts, and used more images.  I never missed a day, and would sometimes post more than once.  I thought more about the blog, had more time to take pictures and saw more metaphors for ideas.  I probably read more back then, and during the earlier years of the blog, taught more.  All of that gave me more blog fodder than I have now.  I've been working to intentionally do more reading; that always gives me more to say.

Thank you for reading.  Thank you for commenting.  Blessings to you!

(By the way, I failed to mention the source of the devotional I quoted yesterday.  It was from the Advent devotional program of the First Presbyterian Church of San Bernadino, California.  Like my own church, the members of this church write and distribute devotional readings.  The author of that particular devotional was Dana Babb.)

Blogging

Friday Five from last week -- questions about Blogging:

1. Have your blogging (writing/reading) habits shifted since the days of yore?  I used to write longer posts, and sometimes more than once a day.  I also used to "see" posts more readily in what is around me.  I definitely took and posted more pictures in the past.  I don't read as much as I used to -- what I read has always been "post starts" for me.
2. Do you have some favorites that you miss?  I miss Cheesehead.
3. Are there some blogs you still put in the 'must read' category?  One of my favorite blogs is actually a knitting blog -- Yarn Harlot.  I always look for new posts from Stephanie.
4. If we gathered at your knee, what would you tell us about those early days of blogging?  I don't really have any stories from the early days of blogging.  I miss those who used to read the blog who I think no longer do. 
5. Do you have a clip or a remembrance of a previous post of yours or someone else's that you remember, you know an oldie but goodie?  Oh, no, not really.  The first set of poems I wrote still stick in my mind.  There was one I wrote early that was printed on the cover of a bulletin at Annual Conference, which was very cool for me.   And one was printed in the Annual Conference newspaper. 

Post #2000

This is Post # 2000.

I like milestones, and I like numbers.  It feels as if 2000 posts is alot of entries.  The blog is 5 years old, and that is more than 1 post / day for that whole time, on average.

Since I started watching these kinds of things, the blog has had almost 59,000 hits.  Each red pin in the map above is a map of the latest 500 page loads.

Thank you for reading and for your comments.

Five Years Today

Today is the Fifth Anniversary of Sandpiper's Thoughts.

Some stats: I haven't quite reached 2000 posts, but I'm over 1900. Since I started measuring, the blog has had over 57,000 hits. The highest one day hit count was 120 on May 23, 2010, and I have no idea why.

Some of my biggest "thrills" with the blog were the following:

• When people find out about it and tell me they like it. This was more common when I first started.
• Comments -- I really enjoy the comments, although I don't comment often about the comments. Even though I write the blog for myself, the comments are affirmational to me, even when you don't agree with me.
• It was a thrill to see the blog mentioned on the West Virginia Annual Conference blog a couple of years ago.
• It was a big thrill to see the blog listed in Circuit Rider, as a United Methodist blog of note.

Sometimes, I don't know what to write. Sometimes, at the end of the day, I'm too tired to write. Sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't write every day, but I know if I stop writing every day, I won't write much at all. So I keep to that commitment.

I'll keep writing, because it seems I must. I'll keep writing because it helps me to clarify for myself what I am thinking. I'll keep writing because it keeps me in touch (sometimes) with God.

I enjoy the blog, and I thank you, whoever you are, for when you read it. I pray something in it is a blessing to you.

Blogging

Go take a look at this article in Circuit Rider by Katie Dawson -- Blogging for Pastors. Interesting article.

Take a look on the second page of the list of a Few Good UM Blogs. Nice list. Notice anything?

How about that? How cool is that? And just how unexpected was it to receive an email from a pastor I know, telling me about it? I don't belong on that list, but I'm flabbergasted to be there.

Wow.

Why Blog?

I was reading the blog Connexions today. Dave Faulkner is asking the question, "Is blogging for self-centered nerds?"

I blog (obviously). I do it daily. Do I do it because I am self-centered? I blog about my walk with God, my thoughts about God and life, and my work with my church. And sometimes I blog about items which do not fit into those categories, but I think most of my posts can be described in those ways.

If I am going to write daily about those topics, then I must, by necessity, pay attention. The discipline of blogging keeps my eyes open -- my thoughts focused -- my mind clicking.

I do consider it to be a discipline -- as much as my devotional reading. I do it because I am self-centered, and I want to become more God-centered. I hope that it is a path to change, not a means of enhancing my egotism.

Why do it publicly? Why not just journal? I could, and I have in the past. I never was able to do it daily. For some reason, for me, the blog prompts me to uphold the daily disciplinary nature of the journal habit. Maybe it's because I know that there are people who are reading it? I do know that I have reached a point in writing where I think must better on a keyboard than with a pen.

One of questions on the RevGalBlogPal site the other day was this: If you keep a blog, how does it connect to your preaching? Do you see your writing as two sides of the same coin? If you don’t have a pulpit, do you see your blog as a virtual pulpit?

Do I use the blog as a virtual pulpit? Oh, I hope not. That is never in my mind. Unless I count it as preaching at myself. That I do!

Am I nerd? That's kind of a silly question. It's not one that I ever worry about. Blogging these

days is as easy as email. It doesn't take a highly technical person to do. But what if I am. I don't care in the slightest.

I am however, proud of my son tonight (to change the topic). He auditioned for and was selected to play in the high school all county band as a freshman. Their concert was tonight. He's the one dressed in green. All that hair! Haircut, please!