His Heart Could be Comforted

John 14:1-4
Italicized stanza from The Message

They sat in the upper room
Expecting Passover
Expecting Tradition
Expecting what they had always known.
Perhaps they should have known better.
Jesus had never been what they expected.

They were just beginning to understand
That the time was coming when he would die.
Had he told them before?
Had they just ignored him?
His voice now was full of urgency
Because he desperately needed them to understand.
Understanding was beginning to arrive,
and with it, fear.

Did he see it on their faces?
Did he hear it in their voices?
Was the cold reality of what was about to happen --
Betrayal
Torture
Death
Seeping into the marrow of their bones?
Freezing their hearts?
Was the ice of fear visible in their exhaled breath?
He must have known it,
He tried to offer them comfort.

Don't let this throw you.
You trust God, don't you?
Trust me.
If that weren't so,
Would I have told you that I'm on my way
to get a room ready for you?
And if I'm on my way to get your room ready,
I'll come back and get you so you also
may be where I am.
You know the way to the place
where I am going.

Peter closed his eyes
And thought of home.
He thought of his wife
Baking bread
Caring for her mother.
Home smelled like comfort.
He yearned for it,
as a child aches for an embrace.
If Jesus promised home,
even a home he could not understand,
then perhaps his heart could be comforted.

Andrew closed his eyes
And thought of home.
It was the place where he belonged
So different than Jerusalem.
He dreamed of his fishing nets,
of the comfort of the familiar.
He thought of his father,
and wondered if he would approve
of the work he was doing.
If Jesus promised home,
even a home he could not understand,
then perhaps his heart could be comforted.

Jesus closed his eyes,
and thought of home.
He had been homesick for years and years.
Separated from his Father.
He yearned to return to God.
It was the place where he belonged.
He ached for His embrace,
like a child longing for the One who loved him.
He wondered if His Father would approve
of the work that he was doing.
If all that must happen,
resulted in a return to Home,
then perhaps his heart could be comforted.

Opening his eyes, Jesus looked around
at the faces of his friends,
and felt torn as he never had felt torn
in his life.
He would miss them.
He was not sure that they were ready.
He loved them, as his Father loved them.
"Abba," he prayed, "Have I done all that I can?"
He felt the love of a Father for His son pour down,
His heart was comforted,
and he was not afraid.

Image from this link.