Afraid of Loss

I was in a meeting the other day.  Our new pastor asked us what we like about our church, what we want from our church, and what we wish for.

What I wrote in response to the "want for" questions was that I wanted our church to not be afraid and to stop acting out of fear of death. We value our church, and we are afraid it is dying. Therefore, many of our actions seem motivated through that fear. Does that even make sense as a thought?

In Tod Bolsinger's book, Invest in Transformation, he writes, "People don't resist change, they resist loss."  What happens when we see opposition to change in that light? I think when we realize that people are afraid, and that they are resisting loss, we can act differently towards them. We are more graceful and helpful. There may be things we can do as leaders in the face of fear of loss that we would not realize were solutions if we were just mad about their resistance to change.

In a later paragraph, Bolsinger quotes Ronald Heifetz, "Most real change is not about the change. It's about identifying what cultural DNA is worth conserving, is precious and essential, and that indeed makes it worth suffering the losses so that you can find a way to bring the best of your traditions and history and values into the future."

How do we help people make that identification without sinking into the quagmire of "how we used to be?"

One more quote from Bolsinger: "So, when an organization feels stress, the default behavior of most organizational leaders is to solve the problems for our organizations rather than change our organizations for meeting the needs of the world. The result is that instead of undergoing transformation to be more effective in our mission to the serve the world, organizations unconsciously reinforce the very status quo that is no longer working." Have you seen that?