Bundled Up

He said, “Go out and stand on the mountain before the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.” Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; 12 and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence. 13 When Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave.  (1 Kings 19:11-13)

It struck me yesterday that the passage above is in some ways an Advent passage. It's not about the coming of Christ, of course, but it is about waiting and watching for God.  It's about patience and expectation.

Elijah (who is the character in the passage) has run away to the wilderness.  In these verses, he is told to stand and wait.  I read this morning that wait and hope have the same root word in Hebrew.  Elijah, like us, is waiting and hoping for God. 

In this busy time of year, we wait in anticipation to find God. There is much to be seen around us - distractions from what we are looking for.  

Frederick Buechner writes, "The Salvation Army Santa Claus clangs his bell. The sidewalks are so crowded you can hardly move. Exhaust fumes are the chief fragrance in the air, and everybody is as bundled up against any sense of what all the fuss is really about as they are bundled up against the wind chill factor."

Could it be that we are too focused on the wind, the earthquakes, and the fire - and maybe that is intentional?

Expectations and Disappointments

If you've ever been on an Emmaus Walk, you've heard the phrase, "Don't anticipate." The pilgrim on an Emmaus Walk is asked to trust the process - don't judge it until it's over - don't worry about what will happen next. Just experience it.

I was a table leader on a walk, and one of the pilgrims at my table felt as if she had thoroughly prepared herself for the walk. She had prayed - she had fasted from all media. She had given herself over to this event. But as it began to unfold, it wasn't living up to her expectations. She was disappointed, and she wanted to leave. The walk leaders convinced her to stay at least through lunch. As it happened, God worked through her Emmaus experience during the worship service prior to lunch, and all was well.

How do expectations and disappointment mesh? Brown says in Rising Strong, "Disappointment is unmet expectations, and the more significant the expectations, the more significant the disappointment."

Does that mean we should never get excited about anything? I remember as a child that I would muffle my excitement about a coming event, just in case it didn't happen. I think that dampening of anticipation is a way we protect ourselves from disappointment.

But what happens to the joy? To the pleasure we feel in looking forward to something? Are we willing to trade away the joy in order to protect ourselves from potential loss?

Brown says it is important to reality-check our expectations. Are we expecting the perfect holiday celebration? Is perfect possible? Are we expecting a relaxing vacation with three kids? Is that realistic? Once we reality check our expectations, then we can find the joy in the excitement of what is realistic, and open ourselves up to the surprise of what we didn't expect, but will discover to be wonderful.

This year we gave up the expectation of a week long vacation at the beach. Steve started a new job in the spring, and new jobs bring opportunities to accumulate vacation days rather than a store of them. Instead, we decided to plan short, week-end getaways. The first was over Memorial Day, and we spent three days traveling throughout our state, seeing things we've always said we should see, but never have (or haven't seen together). The only expectation was a weekend away together, and it was wonderful. There were stories, surprises, relaxing meals, drive time to talk ... It was fantastic, but the joy would have been missing if I had kept my original expectations for the summer.