Time for change

The communion meditation at our Emmaus Gathering this evening was about changes. God comes into our life, and changes us. That shouldn't be surprising -- there are times when we know that we have been changed. There are times when our transformation -- or our journey through transformation is obvious. Even to us.

God brings about changes in us, but he also equips us for change. He enables us to be flexible instead of rigid. In him we find that we are secure enough to accept and to even be excited about change.

Or so we say. Or so I say.

I am challenged by change. Sometimes. There are times when I can face change and find it exciting -- never looking back. Other times, not so much.

Over the past several months, there have been many changes in my life. Some of them have involved my work at church. I was telling a friend the other day that there had been many things at church that I had stopped doing. Change. I wasn't sure if I were still using my gifts as well as I could be or not. And I wasn't sure if there was something else that I should be doing.

I still haven't answered that question. I have very often found joy in doing the work that I do at church. I have seen God working through it. Now there is much of it that I am not doing anymore. At times I have wondered if there are other things that I should have picked up or if this is just a time that I am supposed to hang back. Sit on the sidelines.

Daryl said tonight that God doesn't love us and then throw us away. Don't get me wrong. I haven't felt thrown away -- not at all! As my role has changed, though, I have wondered if God had something new waiting for me or not.

It all sounds very strange coming from someone who has recently been employed by the church. I wonder if my "church work" has just changed focus, and I'm not seeing that. Perhaps this isn't a time of sitting out of using my gifts, but of adapting to a change in what and where I am using them.

I still don't know.

Image: Sky on the way home today.